since I was I child I have been experiencing the pretty unsubtle feeling that I'm not normal.
a bit unsettling at the beginning of my career as a human being, since the "not normal" was dutifully attributed to me by most people too.
problem was that it was never quite meant as a compliment...
more as a puzzled eyes, shrugging shoulders, cringing face, half disgusted reaction, that would eventually lead to the famous last words: - you're not normal ! - .
(whilst I could almost hear their brains actually saying - fucking nutcase ! - )
Oh well !
it has been quite a long while now, since people have not being saying this to me anymore.
most have realised by now that I'm way beyond repair, let alone redemption.
left alone at the difficult task of monitoring my insanity, a few days ago I started making a list of things normal people do, and then comparing it to my own lifestyle preferences, and actually found a few small discrepancies.
I'd like to share some of them with you, if you will...
so here is my TOP TEN list of stuff most people take for granted and I ... don't do :
1 - believe in god.
2 - believe in any authority.
governments, medias, teachers, gurus or chiefs of something, and especially royalty.
(I did bow to a real princess once, but to my merit she wasn't a princess yet and the bowing involved, had more to do with heavy petting really).
3 - affiliations, aggregations, congregations; groups, clubs, teams; memberships; crews, posses, gangs and .......... marriage and kids.
basically any form of association that requires a signature, a uniform, an engagement or a blood oath.
4 - a 9-5 job. I did try for some time, but I'm just not very good at it.
5 - threats and promises. manipulate, cheat, lie and cut in lines at ski lifts.
6 - chit chat, gossip or indulge in hairdresser's waiting room reading material. and Megan Markle. (I wouldn't mind doing another princess but she hasn't asked me...yet).
macho talk, dick swinging contests and political debating and even remotely mentioning the name of Donald Trump. (Fuck ! just did it again !)
7 - any kind of body cleaning product: soap, wash, gel and detergents; pre or aftershave, pre or after sun cream; perfumes, antiperspirants, deodorants; oils, creams, powders; toothpaste and dental floss.
lately I stopped shampoo too... and look at my hair now !
very fond of water though...
8 - doctors, hospitals and medicines.
(since I was 7).
9 - alcohol, cigarettes, cigars; coca cola (I've been rehabed) and cocaine.
(plenty of other stuff I've heard being illicit though...)
10 - seriousness
Wish I could hear what your brains are saying now...